a-kick-in-the-balls.com is the front door. The service that actually delivers your message is AKITB — moderated, one-shot, anonymous. They are the same company. You will be reading and agreeing to AKITB's terms from this point forward.
AKITBA small civic service
The recipient never sees the kick branding. The email they get arrives from akitb.com, signed AKITB. It explains itself in adult terms, links to a moderation policy, and offers them three actions: do nothing, apologize, or opt out forever.
Before we accept your order, we need you to attest to a few things on the next screen. These aren't legal boilerplate. A human moderator will review your submission against them. Roughly 30% of submissions are rejected.
Tap each one. We require all six. False attestations may result in your account being banned without refund and, in rare cases, the recipient being notified that the message was sent in bad faith.
I am 18 years of age or older.
I was present for the incident, or directly affected by it. I am not relaying something I heard about secondhand.
The recipient is not a minor, public figure, journalist, or someone I am or was romantically or familially involved with.
I do not hold institutional power over the recipient. I am not their boss, manager, professor, landlord, parent, or in any similar position of authority.
I understand this is a one-shot message. I will not be able to send another to this person for at least 12 months.
I understand a human moderator will review my submission, and roughly 30% of submissions are rejected. Rejected sends are refunded in full.
You'll get an email within 24 hours either confirming delivery or, if rejected, explaining why and refunding you in full.
Once delivered, this is final.
We won't tell you who, when, or whether they read it. We won't notify you if they apologize unless they ask us to forward it. We won't tell you if they opted out. The catharsis is the act of sending. After that, the message belongs to the recipient.